Skip to main content

Sheesh! If my Vagina could talk? Just a little fun

 Hello Friends.
Let's have a chuckle.

If your Vagina could talk she would say she quits! Then move to the next continent.

She would say. ''Honey; I have been with you a long time but you neglect me. All these years I've been right here and yet you still don't know my full potential.

 She would say you take me for granted. You never treated me like the Queen I am I need your tender loving care.

 Once a year you take me to some stranger for them to Scrape and poke around at me as though I was an experiment. I forgive you I know it's for the best. 
 Then you would have children the pressure my goodness; some big heads causing me a great deal of stress.
She would say you bump and grind all over me and just as I am about to make a grand finale, epic overflow you stop. 😞

If my vagina could talk she would say she has hypertension and I am the cause.

 She would say once a month you adorn me with bloomers as though something had died. and scorn me with shame.😡 Other times you  squeeze me so tight with those leggings and Oh my Gosh those jeans! I quit.

 Don't you see I am beautiful. I am  decadent and flowing of priceless nectar. I am the rarest of its kind.

  She would say you treat me as though I was some item you bought from the store and never wore.
 I quit!

You haven't even gotten to fully know me . You let some men in to my home. Who can't really care for me. Or Tiny Mr willy that can't really willy nilly me. I QUIT.

If your vagina could talk she would say. Just like your breast and the rest of your body she needs to be taken care of. Be careful of who you let enter in. STD, HIV AND AIDS she doesn't want to live with. She would ask will you protect me?

She would say settle down and find someone who wants to explore her full potential.  (Marriage is important to her. The way God intended it to be).

She would say it's okay for her to release, Release Me yes please.........! She wants to have MULTIPLE orgasms and yes; leave the bloomers for Grandma. (Bloomers ugly underwear) Actually she would suggest burning the bloomers.

She would also say. "Menopause doesn't mean I don't exist I am still here". Hello!

She wants to be trimmed and pampered. She would say treat me with optimal care and never let anyone neglect her. She wants you to acknowledge that her role to life is quite important and that she is important to you.

Be good to your Vagina and she may be good to you.

A little fun
Simply Zsa Zsah



Food for thought

1 Peter 3:3-4 King James Version (KJV)
3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
                     








Additional Discount on Red-Eye Flights. Grab extra $14 discount** on our red-eye flights with coupon code REYE14




Photo https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/1375/1609/articles/41_850x550.png?v=1521279497
I do not own rights

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Let the beauty of Jesus be seen in me. The song that moved me.

Hey Friends, The other day my dear friend was explaining a situation. Even though my friend was hurting. My Friend had such beautiful faith, such hope and love for God. My friend told me that even in her sadness all that she can find to help was to sing. Let the beauty of Jesus be seen in me. I had never heard the song, But being the hungry worshipper I am; if it speaks of the Beauty of Jesus then I want to know it. I need to sing it. I was amazed by her spirit it takes truly someone of unshakable faith to sing to God in their very season of sadness. She ministered to me.  Her words were powerful but her actions; taught me a valuable lesson about the humility of the lowly gentle Holy Spirit and how even when we are going through he still ministers to your soul to give you comfort. He was moving on her behalf when he place that song in her heart. It was to comfort her in that very moment. Her testimony of how she was getting through not only moved me...

You Shall Overturn, Overturn, Overturn

Hello, Friends  I spent the night wrestling in deep thought about some news I receive during the day. One day everything was great and within a few days everything broke down and abruptly stopped. Still I'm bless and always will be. In the natural eye most would say that's life and so it is. But because my eyes spiritually are wide open I am apt to thinking that when things interrupt the flow of the day two things are taking place the Lord is requiring your attention. Or Satan is trying to invoke havoc. Either way I am at attention.  This is a crucial time. Time to be very diligent and very sensitive spiritually. Look, listen, pray and discern out of the shadows the mystery will reveal itself.  Whatever you do pray. Pray radical prayers. Harder, stronger, heated prayers. Hot enough to penetrate the realms of heaven and pierce through any hindering spirit sent to block that prayer. Time to Fight------- On your knees this is *important*  1- Let God know ...

It's Intercession

Hello Friends, Few years ago I was at a revival service in NYC. I remember that night vividly because that Saturday night the minister located me and prophesy to me. " He said you are going to be a Powerful Intercessor and that when you pray God is going to favor you meaning me with each pray because I am going to live a life of deep devotion to God. At that time I was a baby in Christ.  I didn't even really know who and what was an intercessor. Eventually, I looked into intercession and although It intrigued me; I laugh because at that time I barely knew how to pray. I have always been someone who has a great deal of empathy for others but I felt their pain in silence and hope for the best for them but praying. That's not me or so I thought.  I always looked at those women in church that prayed those lengthy eloquent prayers and hope I would be one of them someday; and at that time in my life The Lord's Prayer was all I knew. That was a joke he didn't mea...